The Coaching Habit Podcast

The Coaching Habit Podcast

The best strategies for leading yourself and others by tapping into the wisdom of thinkers, leaders, writers and coaches.

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Selena Soo’s One Best Question

Selena Soo helps people connect to influencers, and as a marketing and publicity strategist, she knows the value of relationships. In this interview, Selena poses a question that draws on those very relationships in order to reach one’s goal.

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Full Transcript

Michael: So on The Coaching Habit Podcast, this is what you’re listening to, we always have long interviews with our guests, 25, 30 minutes, something like that. But what I love are these two short interviews we do, one about their favorite questions, one about two favorite resources and sources of wisdom that they use.

I just love these, because they’re kind of short, sweet, focused and because at Box of Crayons, we are so committed to helping people being more coach-like and what that means for us is can you stay curious a little bit longer, can you rush to action and advice giving just a little bit more slowly. I’m always just deeply curious about what people’s favorite questions are.

Because you know, in The Coaching Habit book, there are seven great questions, but of course, there’s lots of wonderful questions out in the world and I’m always kind of interested to find out which ones other people use to great effect.

My guest today, Selena Soo, she is a publicity and marketing strategist, so particularly in the world of self-help and self-development and coaching, she’s worked with some really big names, either directly or indirectly, such as Ramit Sethi, Marie Forleo, Danielle LaPorte, a number of those people have been guests here on the podcast, to really help them build their brand, build their reputation, and she’s been sharing with us some of the strategies and the tools to help you build your profile. And of course, that matters, whether or not you’re an entrepreneur, building your own business or actually if you work inside an organization and you want to further your career.

But Selena, welcome.

Selena Soo: Thank you for having me.

Michael: My pleasure. And you know what this is all about. What is your favorite question, so if you could only share one of the great questions that you ask in your role as a teacher, a guide, and a coach, what would that one question be?

Selena Soo: Yeah, so I help my clients achieve big goals, whether it’s writing a best-selling book or getting high-end clients or having a great launch or getting incredible publicity, so the question I ask them is who has already achieved your goal and who can help you reach that goal faster?

You know, rather than thinking about what are the steps, I like to think about who are the people that can help me get to that goal faster, people who have already gone through the process and who know what kinds of things to avoid and what kinds of things to do and so, that is a question, who has already achieved your goal who can help you get there faster?

Michael:  I love that. So, when you ask that question, are you looking for people who are kind of like, “This is the person I want to be,” like in three years’ time or five years’ time, I’m trying to become the next Ramit Sethi, say. Or are you thinking about people who’ve, they may be kind of in a different field, but have kind of gone through a similar process?

Selena Soo: You know, it really depends on what they’re looking achieve. For example, if they’re looking to get publicity, I like them to think about, okay, who are the leaders in my industry who have achieved this goal? Let’s say somebody is in the personal development or kind of the spiritual space and one of the leaders in their industry is Gabrielle Bernstein, if you’re looking to do more podcast interviews, like, a smart thing to do would Google the words “Gabrielle Bernstein” and “podcast interview” or go onto iTunes and type in her name under podcasts and then all the podcasts that she’s been on iTunes will be listed.

That’s what I call the follow the leader technique, rather than thinking about where should I be, see what the other leaders are doing, and that will help you develop a list of potential podcasts that you could be on. You do that with five people, you could easily have 30 plus incredible media opportunities to start pursuing.

The other thing is to think about who’s right in front of you, do you have other friends that have written that guest post for Positively Positive or contributed for Thrive Global or written for Mind Body Green and then getting their advice and support in terms of reaching that goal for yourself, so it can be people you aspire to be like as well as people in your more immediate circle that can make introductions or offer you tips to reach your goal faster.

Michael: Love that. Can I ask a related question? It’s a bit off topic.

Selena Soo: Absolutely. Oh, I don’t mind.

Michael: When you point to those things, like who’s appeared on these podcasts, or who’s written for these channels, these kind of magazines, do you think it’s better to find, let’s say the top five and write repeatedly for that top five or maybe that, a certain type, or do you think it’s better to try and strategize and go, “Look, I want to have an article in 100 different magazines?”

Selena Soo: Yeah, sure. It really depends on what your goal is. When you write for more places, you have more relationships and those relationships can be really valuable. The other thing is that you also want to have depth. You know?

You know, there are people, like a lot of my clients, maybe there is one publication they have a really deep relationship with, maybe they’re writing weekly for Forbes or monthly for Positively Positive and then there’s other opportunities that they pursue as they come up. There are going to be certain media outlets that are more appropriate for you, given your goals and the type of audience you’re looking to reach, so I would say double down on that, but also expand.

Even for me, for my example, my ideal clients really come from the coaching world, so being on podcasts like this is really valuable for me to reach the kinds of people that I’m looking to serve, but I wouldn’t say no for an opportunity to be in Cosmopolitan or Marie Claire magazine, if they want … someone who is a female entrepreneur who is making it out on their own.

And also, when you’re looking to pursue say, a book deal in the future, if you can show that you have breadth and that have you been able to get mainstream media, it’s going to make you more attractive to potential publishers and could potentially help you get an even bigger book deal.

Michael: Nice, wonderful. Selena, great question. Who’s walked the path before you, is a way of thinking. So, if I’m playing Follow the Leader, who should I be following, so I love that. Wonderful, as I say, so I want people to hear this, not just if you’re an entrepreneur building your business but also if you work inside an organization, say, “Okay, who’s walked that path? What’s their journey teaching me?”

Selena, for people who want you to teach them more about what you do and how you do it, how will they find you on the web? Point to a couple of places.

Selena Soo: Yeah, absolutely, well, they should go to That’s my website and I have a Work With Me page and I talk about my different programs. That would be the number one place to go. I’m also on Instagram, just getting started on there but really enjoying. But you can go to Instagram/Selena_Soo to find me there, as well.

Michael: Perfect. Thanks, Selena. It was wonderful.

Selena Soo: Thank you.

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