So you’ve identified your Advice Monster Habit. What’s next?

First, welcome. You’re in good company because everyone has an Advice Monster Habit. It’s that impulse to jump in with answers and suggestions. 

And it comes from a good place: you want to be helpful, avoid mistakes, fix things fast, and show you’ve got everything under control.

Still, when you default to advice-giving, you often miss what’s truly needed in that moment, which can lead to overwhelm, disempowerment, miscommunication, and lost time across your team. 

Whether you lean towards Tell-It, Save-It, or Control-It, getting to know your Advice Monster persona is the first step toward building a better habit: Coach-Like Curiosity. 

Let’s take a closer look at the different ways the Advice Monster Habit might show up for you– what each looks like and sounds like, and the impact it can have on the people around you.

3 Ways the Advice Monster Habit Shows Up

Your sense of value comes from sharing what you know, or think you know, based on experience and data. If you’re not offering answers, you’re not doing your job or adding value. 

In action, Tell-It often looks like quickly coming in with ideas and solutions, even before you’ve fully understood the challenge or situation at hand.

Sounds like

• "I think you should..."
• “This is the correct way of doing it…”
• “Here’s the best way to do it…”
• “I know…”

Impact

When Tell-It takes over, others don’t get a chance to work through problems or questions on their own. Instead, they start relying on you for the “right” answer and lose trust in their own thinking. 

You feel a deep sense of responsibility for every person, situation, and outcome. To make sure no one stumbles, no one struggles, no one gets anything wrong, you tend to swoop in and do the work yourself.

In action, Save-It often looks like hand-holding through every step, hovering, and getting overly involved in all the minor details. 

Sounds like

• “I’ve made that mistake before. Let me redirect you…”
• “I can do that for you.”
• “Let me help.”

Impact

What Save-It calls support can easily become smothering. Others stop taking initiative because they know you’ll jump in anyway. While things might stay on track in the short term, trust and autonomy struggle to take root.

You want to avoid risks at all costs and steer toward the safest and most familiar path– it’s the only way to succeed! As long as you stay in charge, you can control everything and make sure nothing goes wrong.

In action, Control-It looks like shutting down new or unfamiliar ideas, insisting on best practices, or stepping in to take the helm. You may find yourself putting tight parameters in place to prevent possible hiccups.

Sounds like

• “Let’s take the proven route.”
• “Let’s follow the best practice.”
• “This is the way it’s always been done here.”

Impact

When Control-It leads, the people around you never feel empowered to try new ways because there isn’t any space for experimentation; the need for certainty overshadows possible growth opportunities. And while everything might run smoothly, it rarely moves forward in bold or creative ways. 

Building a better habit

The workplace is full of questions, uncertainties, and pressures. In the face of it all, it’s easy for your Advice Monster Habit(s) to spring into action, naming the solution, stepping in to fix things, or steering everyone toward safer ground.

And yet– what gets lost in those moments? 

Often, it’s the very things that make work work: trust, collaboration, growth, and a sense of ownership.

You can start reclaiming those moments right now, and you’ve already started. Getting to know your Advice Monster Habit is the first step toward practicing Coach-Like Curiosity. 

Now, stay curious a little longer. Start paying attention to the pull of your Advice Monster—when and where it shows up, and what it might be trying to protect.

• Which Advice Monster Habits resonate with you and your behavior the most?  
• Are there specific moments, meetings, or relationships where you feel the pull more strongly?

These insights give you the awareness to pause—and in that pause, the chance to choose differently, making space for others to think, grow, and contribute. The chance to be a more coach-like manager, teammate, or friend.

Ready to turn that pause into a lasting habit?

Explore The Coaching Habit, a learning experience that delivers what leaders and teams are asking for and need. And if you want to chat about how curiosity can help your organization, book some time with our team.